That Time When I Hated Ministry

I am a recovering people pleaser.

There was a time in my life when I said “Yes” to every opportunity that was presented to me. I allowed manipulative people to control me because I hated conflict. I did not speak up for myself because I wanted everyone to think well of me. I bought into a church culture that equated busyness with holiness.

I was miserable. I was depressed. I literally had to “hype” myself up just to go to work in the morning. Because of this,  I became a pastor who absolutely hated “going” to church. I hated ministry. I loved Jesus and I acknowledged that I was built to be a pastor, but I was terribly conflicted.

Hands down, one of the best days of my life as a church leader was the day I finally said “No”. I realized that the only person to blame for the crushing sense of defeat that I constantly felt was Carlo. Every time I said “Yes” to something that I really did not have the time or desire to do. I gave away a piece of my sanity.  I am not saying that life will never put us in positions where we have to do hard or uncomfortable work. Part of being an adult in the real world involves doing things we do not want to do. I get that. What I am talking about is all of the extra stuff that so often crowds out the important stuff. Stuff like, burying our true feelings in order to avoid rocking the boat, the busyness that kills productivity, the faux-obligations, and the guilt-driven tasks that sap us of our energy.

I dare you, take back your life.

There is only one person who should Lord over you and the good news is that His yoke is easy, His burden is light, and His commands are not burdensome (Matthew 11:28, 1 John 5:3).

Say “No” to the so-called good things so that you can start saying “Yes” to God things.

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